@NikiWithIssues: By the power vested in me by my credit card, I now pronounce you my new fluffy hat. You may now hug my head.
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@Sam_Alan33: Staying at a hotel tonight which means I get to play everyone's favorite game: Are you smarter than a new shower?
@jazmasta: [emergency room] "We need to put pressure on the wound!" [to wound] We've been together 6 months now, I think we should move in together"