@NYC_Blonde: By the power vested in me by this vintage merlot, I now pronounce us husband and wife. I may now kiss the bottle.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@UrbanDouchebag: Dear Santa, All I want for Christmas is a copy of your naughty list. Love, -Tim
@Chocovania: GOOD COP: The sign on your door says NOTARY NOTARY: Yes? NOT A GOOD COP: *menacingly leans onto desk* Sounds like something a RY would say
@lacybronze1: I'm surprised more killers haven't lured their victims into their houses by blind folding them and promises of being on a febreze commercial