@therealeatwood: Call me old-fashioned but I think a woman should use her mouth for its intended purpose: for carrying her babies as cats carry their kittens
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@McSwtrvst: I will raise my son to treat your daughters like spoiled princesses, but only if you don't raise your daughters to think they are. Deal?
@k_lli: I carpool with a guy & we have officially run out of things to talk about. Today he commented on how well-made the road was. I agreed.
@ThaJawn: (Animal spelling bee) Owl: Your word is Mississippi Snake: M I Sssssss Sssssssss Badger: *in audience* OH FFS THIS IS GONNA TAKE FOREVER
@Fred_Delicious: To the people complaining about my tweets. Sorry I'm not justifying your monthly subscription of $0