@JermHimselfish: Call me old fashioned, but I'm dying of smallpox.
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@LizHackett: I would be okay with a ghost in the house if every time a bathroom mirror fogged up with steam, it slowly wrote out "DID YOU LOSE WEIGHT?"
@TaylorVirtue: GUYS GUYS GUYS, I just saw this dude wearing the stupidest . . . False alarm, just a mirror.
@Donna_McCoy: Computer problems can be solved with duct tape if you apply it directly to the mouth of the person asking you to help fix their computer.
@noog: "I think that kid's a robot" What? "Look at his mouth" Relax they're just braces *backs away slowly* "That's exactly what a robot would say"