@LetsFav: Can Happiness buy money?
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@SirEviscerate: *holding huge scissors* I hereby declare The Factory That Makes High Voltage Wires That Look Like Ceremonial Ribbons officially open for-
@Fred_Delicious: "Members of the jury, how do u find the defendant?" "we... can't find him at all" "DAMMIT THIS IS THE 3RD MURDER WALDO HAS GOTTEN AWAY WITH"
@angrypumpkins: I was like, "How many times do I have to repeat myself? I feel like a broken record!". They were like, "What's a broken record?".
@ericsshadow: My wife googled "when is it safe to leave a child at home alone" and now she won't let me stay home alone.