@ChaseMit: "Can we stop for a second? I forgot everyone's names again." - me, if I was a character on Game of Thrones
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@djdarrellripley: Me: You never told me you were on the debate team in college.. Her: Yes I did. Me: No you didn't. Her: Yes I did. Me: Oh you're good!
@okimstillhungry: Smoke detector: IS THAT A FIRE I SMELL Me: No I'm making baco- Smoke detector: IM A HERO
@coketruck76: Pal: That's an impressive stingray. How'd you catch it? Me:*flashes back to being dressed as girl stingray* You know, the regular way.
@BradBroaddus: Some guy just passed toilet paper under the stall without me even asking. I'm not sure if he is a pervert or a wizard.