@stats_canada: Canadian Tinder users are 56% male, 44% female and 33% holding a fresh trout
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@itshotterhere: Apparently, if you jump out of a plane wearing parachute pants, it doesn't break your fall at all. But you can carry about a hundred combs.
@StinkyGr33n: My co-worker said he's bleeding out of his ear. "That time of the month?" I replied. He's not amused.
@KKAlThani: I bet when Cheetahs race & one of them cheats, the other one goes like "Man, you're such a Cheetah!" & they laugh & eat a zebra or whatever.