@MarkAgee: Candy corn is the rare candy that's worse than than the vegetable it's based on.
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@70Ceeks: I undo his overall strap & slide it off a barely perceptible shoulder. I pull his steel work goggle down around his "neck" "BanaNA" he moans
@DuaneABarrett: Just overheard someone say, "I wish I had a Kindle that never ran out of batteries." You know. Like a book.
@weinerdog4life: Me: Waiter, there's a duck in my soup Waiter: That's a pond, you're at a park, I'm just here with my family, will you put some pants on?