@weinerdog4life: Can't afford a cat? Duct tape 3 squirrels together, next question
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@stewnami: They add a scent to natural gas so we can smell it if there's a leak and we're in danger. Same reason Axe Body Spray has a scent.
@InternetHippo: GEORGE WASHINGTON: We should put "We Trust In God" on our money THOMAS JEFFERSON: Great idea. Did you get that? YODA (taking notes): Yep
@ibid78: When life hands you 2 Lemons 1 cup sugar 2 tbsp flour 3 tbsp cornstarch 1 cup water 2 tbsp butter 4 eggs 1 pie crust you make lemon meringue
@junejuly12: Keep microwaving fish in the office and stop wondering why you never get a desk by the windows.