@shelbyfero: "Can't argue with that!" he said, pointing to an inanimate object.
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@KalvinMacleod: INTERVIEWER: your resume says that you take things too literally ME: how the hell did my resume say that?
@John_M15: The "Slow Children Playing" signs always make me sad. Would it cost that much more to thrown in punctuation?
@2tickytacky: "You've lost some weight." sounds suspiciously like "You were a disgusting fatso before, but I was too nice to say so.".