@GreenishDuck: Can't believe a woman would grow a life inside of her for 9 months and then name it Ian.
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@envydatropic: Stuck between "that was awesome" and "OMG do you need medical attention" wherever I walk off the dance floor
@Barknado69: Today I saw "Jesus doesn't care about your grades" written on the sidewalk in chalk and all I could think was "Thank god, he'd be pissed"
@BillCorbett: To celebrate Independence Day I'm finding Englishmen and then walking angrily away from them!
@MissNaughty1801: CW:my husband doesn't understand me at all. What about yours? Me:I wouldn't know... I don't talk to him about you...