@aedison: Can't believe I'm still writing "-oslovakian" on all my Czechs.
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@Rollmaninoz: Judge: and how does the defendant plead Lawyer: like this your honor *makes whiny voice *nooo I didn’t do any crimes* Judge: HAH do it again
@1Happytwit: Shouting "Shotgun" will get you the front seat of a car or a heap of cash if you whisper it to a cashier.
@TheAdly: Why is your ass split vertically? Because if it was split horizontally it would clap when you're going down the stairs.