@aedison: Can't believe I'm still writing "-oslovakian" on all my Czechs.
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@dog_feelings: the human thinks. i won’t get excited. if they say. doubleyouayellkay. instead of. walk. but guess what. i am excited
@bossybutfair: If I see under 30s getting married, I want to kiss them for their optimism and punch them for their stupidity.
@SirEviscerate: HER: (touching my chest) What a fascinating tattoo... ME: Thanks. I was carrying a squid and a porcupine, and I tripped.
@natalie2111: Have you ever listened to someone talk for a while and started to wonder "who ties your shoelaces for you?"