@foursquids: Can't believe people still say "pot" it's not the 70s anymore we call it "saucepan" now
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@NYC_Blonde: I told the barista my name was "Britney Spears" just for giggles and he handed me my coffee with "annoying white girl" written on it instead
@YesItsAl: I'd like to be so rich I forgot what country I left my private jet at after a crazy weekend
@anerdonfire2: I forced her to tell me what I was to her Apparently, I'm the 5th in line of guys she talks to when she's bored
@XplodingUnicorn: [playing the board game Guess Who] Me: Is your person handsome? 5-year-old: No, they look like you.