@WordsOfaHooker: Can't believe the Obama 2012 campaign isn't using the slogan "Once you go black, you don't go back."
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@jonnysun: be careful when u talk baby talk to a baby becuase if u dont understand what ur saying u may acidentaly be declaring war in baby langauge
@hippieswordfish: *she leans in close* 'kyle, what's your wildest fantasy?' *i close my eyes and imagine opening a 10pc chicken nugget and finding 11 pieces*
@ThoughtOtter: Me at a wine tasting: *swirls glass* *sniffs* *sips slowly* *stares off into the distance* ...Ah, yes. This is in fact wine.
@T_N_Crumpets: *Bruno Mars on the radio* Wife: Would you catch a grenade for me? Brain: Just say, YES! Me: Has the pin been pulled? Brain: Idiot!