@GibJimson: Capri Sun taught me how to stab with accuracy.
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@Donnie_Fairburn: DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE A COP Ok, now that there are definitely no cops reading this...I'm trying to find some cocaine for this weekend guys
@doktorj: Me: Good night Moon Moon: Me, climbing out of lunar module two weeks later: Did you get my text?!
@gruffybeard: Counselor: Why do you resent your wife Me: She made me get out of line for Springsteen tix C: Why M: Something about her water breaking
@canadasandra: What does it mean if the Holy Water sizzles when it hits your skin (asking for a friend)