@alispagnola: Carpe DM
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ryangriffiths: People that say "The worst kind of cut is a paper cut" probably haven't been stabbed in the face before.
@GlumGeorgeLucas: My interior decorator quit on her first day on the job. I told her to paint all the walls in my house to be green screens.
@KKAlThani: Just banged my toe on a table & kept moaning in pain so much that I made a new Coldplay song.