@ScottLinnen: Cats are just fuzzy houseplants that hate you.
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@XplodingUnicorn: Me: You need to eat vegetables instead of candy if you want to be tall. 4-year-old: I’ll just be small and happy.
@spotswoj: Well, she was raised to refer to dinner as 'supper' so obviously it wasn't going to work out in the end.
@withanewname: "Honey?! What did you feed him? His poop is huge ... and green!" [the first of many struggles that Bruce Banner's parents faced]