@IamEnidColeslaw: cats are the best because you can pet one while you're talking to someone and look totally evil
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@RobDenBleyker: If a woman asks you to guess her age, always subtract 10 years from your estimate. IMPORTANT: Do NOT do this if she's in her early twenties.
@maurex23: [spelling bee] -your word is 'amnesia' -can you use it a sentence, please? -your word is 'amnesia'
@Michabean: My family made a pact that I'm the first to be sacrificed in a zombie apocalypse because I'll slow them down. That's my workout motivation.