@riverpig12: Cats get a pass bc they're "Cleaning themselves". Dogs are like, Hey! I can reach this?!?!
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@LoveNLunchmeat: I try not to snack at night, but the cheese in my fridge haunts me. What if I die in my sleep and NO ONE EATS IT?
@sliver_of: I’ve been buying men’s hoodies for years for myself. It’s all about skipping the middle man.
@GrantTanaka: [cuddling w/ 5 yr old son] I hope he wants to do this forever [25 yrs later] this has lost its charm