@Sveldtsmelt: Cats have tails so you can swing them around. Duh.
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@KalvinMacleod: BOSS: you're fired ME: is it because I won't take no for an answer? BOSS: no ME: is it because I won't take no for an answer?
@paulablu22: A good way to mess with a jogger is to run up along side them and say "I think we lost them."
@wtfhuman: Is it 5 seconds from when it hits the floor or when I see it? I just noticed a skittle under my desk. I don't remember eating skittles.