@WilliamAder: Caught myself staring into the medicine cabinet like I do with the refrigerator.
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@UncleDuke1969: "Mom?" "Yes?" "Are we having seafood for dinner?" "No, why?" "I heard Dad on the phone." "And?" "He said that he picked up a case of crabs."
@topaz_kell: Health Tip: If you find a pill on the floor of a public restroom, rinse it off before taking it.
@garrettbarry70: Dad, was I a cocky teenager? Only when you watched Baywatch in your pyjam.... DAAAD!