@Classy_Cassy89: Cause of Death: Dropped full can of soda on baby toe.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@realHamOnWry: My apologies to Tom Cruise. I honestly thought that Scientologists dug up and studied old scientists.
@sarcasm_inc: "2015 AND PETSMART STILL DOESN'T HAVE FITTING ROOMS," I say somewhat loudly as Fluffy has to try on sweaters right there in the aisle.
@50NerdsofGrey: 'Tell me you want me' he ordered. 'I want you' she said. 'Now tell me you need me.' 'I need you' she sighed. She hated calling tech support.
@envydatropic: I will never have to admit to a mistake at work when I can blame the last person who quit