@birbigs: Chamomile tea makes chamomile pee.
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@krakkenlackin: "You are what you eat" I chant furiously, shoving another roach in my mouth. Mushroom clouds keep growing in the distance
@BonaFideIntent: Drunk Draft Folder Contents: "Trees. LOL." "I was born once. Pickles." "Spice Girls" "Toes. Are on my feet. Both feet. Not just one."
@mackswift: Ladies, not every guy who talks to you wants to bang you. Some of us know that you have snacks in your purse.