[Chaperoning field trip] ME BEFORE WE GO: Only rule is don't lose any kids. AFTER I LOSE A KID: New rule. You're allowed to lose one kid.

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@pinupteacher: [Chaperoning field trip]

ME BEFORE WE GO: Only rule is don't lose any kids.

AFTER I LOSE A KID: New rule. You're allowed to lose one kid.

1 comments

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@dafloydsta: DAVID ATTENBOROUGH: Here we see the weakest of the herd in its natural habitat. [camera pans to me laying in bed eating cake]

@davidkenny100: Pal: wanna impress your wife? Girls love a guy that shaves downstairs Later Wife: David! Why is there hair all over the coffee table!?

@causticbob: Roses are red, violets are blue, this poem is overused, just like your mum.

@LurkAtHomeMom: My husband just left town for a work trip. I didn't want him to miss out on anything so I made him a mixtape of the kids whining.

@d2BMcG: I went to an AA meeting I met a lot of batteries

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