@JosesLovesYou: check if your cocaine is good, mix in vinegar. If it makes a volcano, its baking soda. If not, your drugs is ruined. Drugs are always bad.
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@OrangeFact: Apples are actually bad for your health! Scientists have discovered that everyone who ate an Apple during the 15th Century is now dead.
@Parkerlawyer: Before you call me, ask yourself, “Can I text it?” Before you text me, ask yourself, “Can I email it?” Before you email me, ask yourself, “Can I just think it really, really hard?”
@DanDoofus: Twitter is over Capacity! Well, so's my liver but you don't see me slowing down because of it.
@SaulKewl: honey the ppl of atlantis lost an entire city & thats like 2000x bigger than a baby so idk if all this yellin is necessary