@iwearaonesie: *checks sons backpack to see how I did on his project*
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@NintenDom: I just got off the phone with God. He's pretty bummed out. Poor guy has a huge crush on an atheist, but she doesn't even know he exists.
@4SLars: No, I always make this wincing face when I talk to people saying awful shit. It's not just you.
@Beer_Blonde_: A younger man said I have a smokin hot body for an older woman... I'm not sure if I should thank him or put him in a time-out.
@NervousJr: Told my mom "The D" stood for donuts, and now she won't stop telling people she wants the chocolate D.