@anylaurie16: Chelsea Clinton charges $65,000 for a 10 minute speech. How many times has her husband said, "Honey, I can’t afford to hear about your day.”
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@WilliamAder: Me winding up as the last man on earth is an unlikely scenario, but an awful lot of women seem to have already thought it through.
@vicki_gurley: My dad is so cheap that when he dies he is going to walk towards the light and turn it off..
@ilikeyouguys: What if gravity...was invented by the vacuum industry so there was always shit on the floor to clean up. Just hear me out tho.