@jedfudally: childrens alphabet books are the only thing keeping us from forgetting what a xylophone is
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@Sanbel11: Every day I learn something new as a parent. Today I learned I can't sit through my daughter's violin recital without a desire to die.
@ericsshadow: If your girlfriend says she's going out to run some errands and comes back with 6 bags from the mall... You might be dating my wife.
@OtherDanOBrien: ME: I hate him with 1/16th of the fibers of my being GUY: Not every fiber? ME: I hate alot of people. I'm not wasting all my fibers on 1 guy