@Brentweets: Chipotle has been hacked for an hour and hasn't noticed... Taylor Swift was hacked and wrote an album about it 30 seconds after.
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@RandiLawson: I feel a special bond w/ ppl that always pop up in my 'May Know' Facebook window. Like u see me,I see u &we've both agreed not to be friends
@SortaBad: Idea: a neck tattoo that depicts a man having an unsuccessful job interview because of his neck tattoo
@TheDreamGhoul: [inventing the parrot] HOW ABOUT LIKE A TYE DYE CHICKEN WHO SCREAMS ACTUAL WORDS AT YOU
@LindaInDisguise: Me: We do *not* spit on our classmates! 5YO: Well, who DO we spit on, then? I miss the funny stuff my kids said when they were little.