@JasonLastname: Chivalry isn't dead. He's just sleeping. Right, chivalry? CHIVALRY!?
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@c_always_wright: high school was the free trial version of college. “if you wish to continue your education you can buy the complete pack for $50,000”
@Parker_Simpson: Studies show that people who start a sentence with "studies show..." have no clue what they're talking about
@DBMaxP: Having a dog around pretty much denies any opportunity to take advantage of the 5 second rule on a dropped chip
@Sassafrantz: Ghosts are pretty cool because they can literally do anything they want, but they choose to hide my keys.