@JustMug: "That looks interesting. I think I'll eat it." - Sharks and Toddlers

@PJTLynch: Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Technically I pulled myself over, you only asked C: I know, right? They make us say it like that

@Togsbabble: My dog eats his puke and dirty tissues... but I point him to a mushroom I dropped and he gives me the "what is this shit" look.

@themiltron: god: go to earth jesus: why god: i have a plan jesus: is it a nice plan god: it's a plan

@sarcasm_inc: I would dress like Batman more often, but I cant run the risk of giant aliens invading and mistaking me for a large Pez dispenser.