@TheTweetOfGod: "Church of England Formally Approves Female Bishops". Congratulations British women! You can now move diagonally!
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@stacywawa1: The ex just asked me how can one have a soulmate if one has no soul? Wonder which of us he was referring to?
@IvoryGazelle: *Abandons ship* *Ship gets adopted* *Tracks down ship in adulthood* *Ship is happy and wants nothing to do with me*
@ChrisStokdyk: Do you ever wake up, look yourself in the mirror and say, "My God, I look like a pillow" ? If so, that's not a mirror - it's your pillow.