@brennadine: Cinderella taught me that everything will work out just fine so long as you have unconscionably small feet.
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@StinkyGr33n: Boss to our group: "Let's talk about what inspires you. Mike, you go first." Me: *Goes home*
@WPLGLocal10: Man arrested after accidentally texting probation officer asking if he had any weed
@shariv67: Maybe we should be focussing less on Goldilocks and more on why Mama and Papa bear don't sleep in the same bed anymore.