@ChaseMit: "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs" could also describe every menu item at Olive Garden.
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@philmann: I'm the opposite of a bee keeper. I lose bees all the time. I left a hive on the train today. Just accidentally threw a bee at a nun.
@omgthatspunny: The Black Death was the best disease. Any attempts to replicate it are just plague-iarism.
@ElitatheLibra: Miles: Mom what does clitoral damage mean? Me: 😳 Use it in a sentence, baby Miles: Like clitoral damage in a war? Me: Co-lat-er-ul, babe
@Jenny4ashley: Romeo and Juliet is my favorite story about how when you fall in love, it's best to just kill yourself.