@wolfpupy: clutches my newly bought loaf of bread nervously as i walk past the duck pond
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@internetluke: [sees a zebra for the first time] What's up with that horse? [sees a giraffe for the first time] Okay, what the hell is going on today?
@loudmouth_usa: My therapist wants me to start coming in twice a week probably because I'm super interesting
@bobbiejo448: 5yo: I can't wear those socks today. They say Wednesday. Me: If anyone notices, tell them you're here from the future to save the world.
@PatsHoppedUp: Doc: Maam, due to the accident your daughter cant... Mom: Cant what?! D: She cant even. She literally cannot even. M: *single tear falls*