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@pseudofauxme: C'mon, dude. Man up and ask her if she likes me.
@sirrruh: My secret ingredient is letting somebody else cook.
@PLATINUM2000: Who said chivalry is dead, I open the door at least a hundred times a day for my cat and dogs.
@DamonHunzeker: He died doing what he loved -- screaming for help and punching a bear.
@MyPolishFace: Me: We should go to the gym more often.
Him: I hate it there. It's like a meat market. And I'm the expired meat.
@XplodingUnicorn: What I was supposed to teach my kid before kindergarten:
What I actually taught her:
1) the dance to Thriller