@stacywawa1: C'mon, I can't be the only one that does kegels to pass the time in meetings
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@shutupmikeginn: friend: Are you eating a whole frozen pizza by yourself? me: It was on sale for $4 friend: I wasnt asking because I thought it was expensive
@tastefactory: 2005: We want cell phones to be so tiny 2015: We want cell phones the size of the big rib from the Flintstones intro that tips the car over
@KevinFarzad: Before college, I didn't know what I was doing with my life, but now I'm confident I have no idea what I'm doing.