@TheTweetOfGod: CNN just wondered if I'm sending disasters to punish you for your sins. No, I'm sending them to punish you for CNN.
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@stephenjmolloy: [Tour of an olive oil factory] Guide: This is where we squash the olives. [Tour of a baby oil factory] Guide: You don't want to go in there
@sofarrsogud: *maintains eye contact while checking 'Dating Librarians For Dummies' out from the library.
@thecoliny: DATE: so what kind of writing do you do? ME: um, cursive, regular… DATE: no I mean- ME: actually I can't do cursive :/