@TheTweetOfGod: CNN just wondered if I'm sending disasters to punish you for your sins. No, I'm sending them to punish you for CNN.
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@girl_a_whirl: Batman: Life isn't a video game. Your actions have consequences *Robin writes 'I'm sorry I forgot to buy Charmin®' 100 times on Batpaper*
@UncleDuke1969: On March 17th, 1992, I asked my parents for directions to a restaurant in Brooklyn. As of 7:30 this evening, they’re still arguing about it.
@Izianikapani: Him:When do you get off? Me: Usually once you go to sleep Him: Me: Him: Me: Oh you mean work? 6 o'clock Hun, see you then.