@CM2BTTHD: Co-worker had a meltdown over someone having a b-day cake. Said since she has no willpower, stop bringing cake in. Tonight, baking cookies.
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@bobvulfov: [i get run over by a bus] MEDIA: flattened idiot has troubled past, has written over 600 pages of sexualized shrek fan fiction
@caliluvgirl77: I can't have a boyfriend because my clean laundry goes on the other side of my bed.
@SuperApple80: My son is currently eating Spaghettios with chopsticks and that’s not even the weirdest thing he’s done all day.