@slimmy_shady: Co-worker: My husband & I are praying for a baby. Me: You know that's not how you get 1, right? You gotta have sex. What does HR want now?
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@girlontapas: Am I capable of premeditated murder? Your honor, I've been planning my cheat day for two weeks.
@GaryJanetti: Next season on Game of Thrones they're actually going to come to your house and start killing the people watching.
@Sarcasticsapien: If life were a romantic comedy I would be the guy on a date with the girl when the male lead makes his grand gesture that wins her back.
@PMTheron1: I just saw this advert and the lady said allergies cause you to avoid the things you love. That explains why I never get laid.