@Hormonella: Coffee so good it helps a little old lady cross the street.
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@notalogin: Surgeon: I need someone to unroll this bandage, stat! Cat nurse, excitedly: I've got this.
@Soren_Ltd: Sex with me is like a ferris wheel: slower than you hoped, full of clunky stops and a carny watches to make sure you don't get off.
@treydayway: I hate when people use words without knowing the meaning...gives me a huge hysterectomy on the side of my head.
@fro_vo: ER Doc: you know you could have avoided these 3rd degree burns by walking away from the explosion at regular speed Me: did it look cool tho