@Hormonella: Coffee so good it helps a little old lady cross the street.
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@Brianhopecomedy: I told my Mom that I was going to the Apple store and she said, "You sound like you're 4 - it's the grocery store".
@TheHyyyype: ME: is there a doctor on this flight?? GUY: i'm a doctor ME: thank god! can you talk to my son? he wants to study philosophy