@coIIegestudentz: College parties are great: You're taking shots with future doctors and the next Supreme Court judge is throwing up in the bathroom.
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@XOperfectmessXO: When you search your kid's backpack and find they have a project due tomorrow and wish you would have found drugs instead.
@Bexdora: In every teen body-swap film there's that moment where they look in the mirror & are shocked to see an adult. That's my morning routine now.
@gingerfaced: Did you ever think about ten years ago you'd be saying.. "I really hope this is a chick I'm talking to".
@cervixsmash: Mobile tweeting with 3% battery is a lot like the band playing while the titanic sank