@juliussharpe: Cologne - because people shouldn't have a choice whether or not they want to smell you.
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@Rollinintheseat: Please, person who just said "libary", tell me more about what an avid reader you are.
@DanLaMorte: Kids here's a tip. Next Christmas leave Santa marijuana cookies and watch how happy your parents magically become the next morning
@GashleyMadison: [at restaurant] -sees baby screaming in high chair -walks over & picks baby up -walks outside & puts baby down "You're free," I whisper.