@_ElvishPresley_: [commercial for boiling water]
*enemies at castle wall are splashed with cool refreshing water*
castle guard: there must be a better way!
![[commercial for boiling water]
*enemies at castle wall are splashed with cool refreshing water*
castle guard: there must be a better way!](/cache/109718.jpg)
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@GibJimson: If you ever get drugged by someone and they steal an organ, just check Craigslist. That's probably where I'm selling it at.
@ItsAndyRyan: I met my wife while on holiday. Which was awkward, as I'd told her I was going to a funeral.
@b_griff88: The cable company is sending a guy out between 1:00 and 2017.
@MafiaJoker78: Hey mate! Your girl looks like a horse... Are you in a stable relationship?
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