@omgthatspunny: Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.
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@ProudFFAalumni: woke up just in time to push my cat off the bed before he threw up. today is going to be magical.
@andreahardy33: Just realized the girl I flipped off in the parking lot is in my next class.. This could be awkward.
@dafloydsta: HER: I'm leaving you ME: But why? HER: There's just no chemistry between us anymore CHEMISTRY: Wow, I'm like right here
@BonaFideIntent: Where's the gratification in tearing down another human being? It's much easier to have heart, than walk w a self-inserted rod up your ASS.