@DamienFahey: Congratulations, Americans who write "Cheers" at the end of e-mails. You've found something even more pretentious than "Sent from my iPhone"
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@Tmoney68: Got kicked out of the karaoke bar last night for getting 3 women pregnant when I sang Careless Whisper.
@michaelianblack: If we all just agree that we're fine, we'll never again have to ask each other how we are.
@murfer28: I don't want to lock my account because I like to help my X's feel better about themselves when they check in & make sure I'm still a drunk.