@Terdoh: Considering what Bruce Wayne and Tony Stark did with their wealth, Bill Gates should be ashamed of himself.
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@Ristolable: I never made it as a firefighter. I thought arsonists were people who hated arson, so every time we met one I thanked him for his support
@jimmytorosian: Me: "I have octopus like reflexes." Person: "Don't you mean cat like reflexes?" Me: *squirting him with ink* "Nope."
@JulianLeeComedy: I've just had to reset my password to Delicate Luggage Handler as I was told it had to be case sensitive.