@murrman5: [consoling widow] I was the one who put the kick me sign on your husband. I had no idea you owned a horse that can read
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@DanMentos: “Hello, 911” Help I’m being murdered! “Can you put the murderer on please” what “Gotta hear both sides"
@Playing_Dad: If a pregnant friend tells you what the kid's name will be just whisper "AND THE DARK LORD'S PROPHECY WILL BE FULFILLED." They love that.
@iGreenMonk: I'm so embarrassed. I just learned that that Pringles holder on my treadmill is for water bottles!