@shadonium: What I hated the most in Facebook? . . . . . . . See more

@Sarcasticsapien: Describing anything that happens in 2017 makes me sound like a crazy person who just screams at park benches.

@TheBeerGuy73: Well, Clarice, have the lambs stopped screaming? ROFLMFAO! JK! Lolz Ttyl KK Ur BFF, Hannibal ~ Hannibal Lecter discovers text messages

@FatherWithTwins: "Daddy, I was just in the bathroom peeing, nothing else. That's all, so you don't need to look." - my 6yo, not sounding at all suspicious

@thestlouisan: Wife just said "burgs" instead of "burgers" and now I'm a little scared to think of what she's going to do with all the time she saved.