@JennyJohnsonHi5: Cops are raiding Justin Bieber's house looking for eggs. Seriously. Eggs. I can't make this shit up. This is why other countries hate us.
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@AsgardianRose: Harry Potter: A Shortened Version Voldemort: I must kill Harry Potter. Everyone else: Lol, no.
@Cheeseboy22: Startle and amuse your cat by replacing its kitty litter with Poprocks. (Ladies: feel free to share this idea on your pinny website thing.)
@lazerdoov: Call your boring friend Simon, "Sighmon" he'll never know the difference and you can laugh about it with your cool bros over beers.